Don't Hold On, Start Being Held
I saw this quoted by a friend the other day and, although I love the sentiment behind it, I cannot reconcile the transition between the holding on (I mean really clinging on, clenching so tightly and gasping for breath because if you let go you may break, or dissolve or just fade away) and 'just' being held. Just to be held. This requires letting go of what you are carrying. It requires you to trust in the holder/s. It means to let go of some control. The difference between the old me and the temporary me is that I used to be the one doing the holding. I loved being in community where favours are asked of each other and lives are woven together with interdependence. I still have to hold on in some respects; as mother, wife, homemaker, employee. But these past six months have been some of the most difficult I've faced and I've felt unable either to hold on any longer, or to reach out and be held. The pit of darkness I've been lying at the bottom of has be